Mellow, but not mellow enough to sleep yet.

I'm trying to keep up with the blog a little more. Caroline and Laurenn, it's mostly for you two.

I just finished watching Where the Wild Things Are. It was good, however, i feel that it was talked up a lot. This tends to happen with most 'big' movies and by the end of all the hype you're left feeling...meh? I did like it tho. The kid was nuts, but awesome. I want to build a fort.

Yesterday I saw Caroline for the first time in about a year. She came in to get her hair cut because we hadn't had a chance to hang out at all over the winter break. I ran to her and we both started crying. It was strange. I didn't realize how much i missed her. skype has been all we've had for so long and then finally there she was. The last time i remember being that excited to see someone was Laurenn when she got back from 10 months away in Europe. Friends?, i miss you. just so you know.

sigur ros is playing. i'm attempting to use it as a tactic in falling asleep. I think i'll be ready soon.

Just before i opened up this page i was poking on facebook a sec and ended up in a photo album from st.hermans. i'd heard in the past few weeks that what i saw in the photo was fact, but i've seen it now in front of my face. He has a gf. I feel nothing really but a , 'huh.' inside of me. it's weird, admittadley, but in the grand scheme it just...is. i don't know the depth of this relationship or any of the details. frankly, it's none of my business and i don't care to know...i just want him to be happy. really.

i'm still afraid of relationships. the thought of having that commitment this soon makes me want to curl up in a ball.

i feel like myself in this moment. the self that you feel when you feel the most human and are okay with who you are and where you are.